Shorts

Compliments And Greetings

Berthold Brecht once wrote an ode to a nation whose government had lost all faith in it. The faith could have been restored had the nation doubled its work rate, but the famous writer wondered instead whether the government would have been better off "sacking the nation and electing another one".

Such a course of events is out of the question in Serbia: our government is not only happy with the nation, but also bold enough to say so quite openly. The Belgrade daily Politika recently devoted an entire page to its beloved nation, which received the compliments and congratulations of its government for showing courage and understanding during the hard times of unjust and unprovoked global sanctions. Although "faithfully yours" sounds almost unreal and could even reduce an individual or two to tears, one gets the impression that the government somehow forgot to add that a nation that managed to endure the hardship of sanctions should have no trouble dealing with the challenges that their loving government has in store for them.

Costly Stinginess

A prominent socialist and managing director of the Pozarevac Health Centre,

Dr. Mladen Bojovic, failed to get his name on the list of candidates in the federal election unit 15, or any other election unit for that matter. Although the ruling Socialist Party of Serbia (SPS) had big plans for Mr.Bojovic and his career, it had no choice but to pull him out of the race after an unexpected incident spoiled everybody's plans. Bojovic made a name for himself when he voluntarily reduced the list of state-financed medicines eligible for prescription from 600 to 70. One can only assume that Bojovic must have thought the original list was probably made by an insane, thriftless individual who cares not how that might affect the state budget, and decided to make his own list which became official in the Pozarevac district.

Unfortunately for Bojovic, patients in local hospitals, guided by their own selfish interests to survive or get better, depending on the illness, didn't quite share his opinion. Neither did the Constitutional Court of Serbia, which declared the list illegal and charged Bojovic with abuse of power, after panic-stricken patients launched a petition and made sure it reached the right place.

The original list is once again the one in effect, but the man who decided to cut it short never made it to the list of candidates which, had all gone according to plan, would have had his name at the top. It will remain a mystery whether Bojovic's action was motivated by his thrifty nature or, God forbid, ill intentions for his patients.

Late Payments Are Always A Problem

It must be that nine former state officials from the province of Kosovo are sick and tired of the privileges they have had for decades, for why else would they come up with the proposition to actually pay for their villas, so richly deserved for the wise policy they pursued in post-war Yugoslavia. Fadilj Hodza, Dzavid Nimani, Iljaz Kurtesi and a few others want to keep up with their mates in power now, in terms of financial and presumably social status, yet they have agreed to buy out their state-owned homes.

However, it seems the Republic of Serbia is unable to meet their kind request, at least for the time being. No state is foolish enough to break its own laws, and the law says that the nine disputed villas belong, or did belong to the Autonomous Province of Kosovo-Metohija, which is no longer autonomous.

Although the nine musketeers of the predominantly ethnic-Albanian populated province went to court, petrified that they might get evicted and start living like common mortals, they had little success in their attempts to secure a roof over their heads for the ever so uncertain future. In the meantime, hoping for a change in fortune, they are making sure that they pay rent on time.

Coalitions

The Association of Individuals with Foreign Currency Savings has signed a Protocol with the Yugoslav United Left (JUL) binding it to unreserved support for the Alliance during the coming elections. In return, JUL will make sure that the luckless individuals are compensated for every dime they had lost to banks which mysteriously lost track of their savers' money when the economy collapsed. At this moment, no information has yet been released whether the protocol will be signed by Mrs Dafina Milanovic, Mr. Jezdimir Vasiljevic and the directors of state-owned banks, but this is undoubtedly the best way to return the money to their owners: get all bankers who got away with milking the population dry to join the JUL, for they will surely pay back what they owe to their people and country after some gentle, comrade-styled criticism.